My Experience - Avinash Iyer

This one was a long time coming. I had it inside my mind for almost a few years now but never found time to give it any form or put it in a few sets of words.

Well, before I start I think I should probably gently remind the reader that the content found here is my own work and not Sri Kothandram Swamiji Trust’s. I wholly own the responsibility for my article and have written it at my own free will.

I was an Average Joe back then (not that I am an Einstein now!) with a strong inclination towards Hippie-ism. I am not a guy from the Swinging-60s but loved the concept of Hippie-ism as I stepped into my adult-life post-2004. I am the guy with a million imperfections. That led to mix with a bunch of eccentric fellows. Every meeting inadvertently ended up having a debate on a wide range of topics - Religion, politics, sex, Left Wing, Right Wing, Capitalism – you name it. As time passed by, I realized that I had become an atheist. I denied the existence of God and vehemently started ‘preaching’ atheism to my other friends and non-Hippies. The idea of ‘God’ seemed ridiculous to me. Carl Sagan, Isaac Asimov, Richard Dawkins and Charles Darwin (and many from that League) became my ‘gods’. I loved their works.

It was then I met Swamiji in a ‘religious function’. I said I did not believe in Hinduism anymore. I disassociated with it because I did not find it appealing. Religion was indeed poison. He listened to my points patiently without offering his comments or showing his reactions. When I finished, he asked me to introspect further. We parted ways then. That meeting hardly lasted two minutes.  

Nothing changed overnight. I did not find any ‘spark’ during the meeting or soon after the meeting. I carried on with my life and my ‘atheism propaganda’. But we bumped into each other every now and then in various pseudo-religious functions. Each time we met, I told him I was still a ‘confirmed-atheist’. Each time he smiled and asked me to introspect deeper. He never asked me to ‘change’ or embrace any ‘religion’. He respected my stand. I mutually respected his. I found that attitude strange because we often meet somebody who eagerly wants the other fellow to join or respect his/her school of thought.

Since Hippies discuss a lot about ‘altered state of consciousness’, I wanted to explore the same but without the use of any harmful substance. I went to Swamiji and asked me to initiate so that I can start Kundalini Yoga to experience all those ‘cool stuff’. He initiated me and my wife at the same time. He just asked me to observe as I ‘experience’.

In the beginning, as I meditated nothing happened. Days rolled into weeks, weeks rolled into months, and months rolled into a few years. Things started to change gradually. I started to ‘experience’ the ‘cool stuff’ that I wanted to, since my Hippie-days. Something miraculously happened. I began to ‘feel’. One might ask what’s so special about this ‘feeling’. Everybody feels. There is nothing ‘extra-ordinary’ about it.

Truth is - it was the ‘thinking faculty’ that led way to ‘feeling faculty’.

The transformation was obvious. It took its own time, at its own pace and not at my will. But it is complete.

The reader must not mistake me. I am not saying that I am perfected Yogi. No, not at all. I am far from it. But I seized to be an ‘atheist’. I started to see the connections between one man and another, between one religion and another, between one dogma and another.

This gives rise to a plethora of questions. Obviously! Does that mean I am a religious person now? Does that also mean atheists do not ‘feel’? Does that mean all religions are equal? Does that mean we ‘have’ to be religious?

My interactions with Swamiji, the meaningful conversations that I had with him over the last seven years and the meditation sessions have only made me a better person. It all helped me to go beyond the prejudice, malice or negative feelings towards people of other ‘faith’ or schools of thought. 

Religions do not separate people; people do. Spirituality, on the other hand, unites us all. I did not become a religious person but a spiritual person (or at least, I think!). 

I do not consider a particular religion or dogma or doctrine superior to others. All roads lead to Rome. All religions lead to the same place. 

It may not be a ‘God’ but definitely Harmony and Peace. 

I believe in it and try to do my best to bring harmony and peace, wherever I am. 

Peace!